American women may be wondering why mail-order bride platforms are so popular with men. It’s probably not out of jealousy because they are pretty independent and self-assured, and if they are interested in marriage, they can go after that goal.
Maybe it’s just a matter of curiosity, but it is probably worth looking into just to understand why American men gravitate to finding a foreign bride. Are there big differences between American and foreign women that motivate them? It’s complicated, as they say.
Looking at the Women of the World
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Here, we have to divide the world up. Of the 192 officially recognized countries on our planet, there are three general categories – undeveloped, developing, and developed. And the status of women in these countries is very different, depending on where their countries fall on this spectrum.
For example, if you were to visit Yemen or Laos, you would find women in extremely subservient, if not almost slave-like, roles compared to men. They exist to serve men and to do their every bidding. The traditional role of a woman as a mother and at-home wife is entrenched. They do not venture out into a world beyond their homes and communities.
In developing countries, life is a bit better for women. They are not required to cover their bodies and isolate themselves from the larger community. But they still perform traditional roles as wives and mothers – taking care of the home, raising children, and caring for elders as well. Some do work if the society is primarily agrarian, but for the most part, they are not educated.
In developed countries, roles of women are far more, if not totally, equal to men. It’s common for wives to hold down careers, and both partners share in child-rearing and household responsibilities. Women in America have far more in common with their peers in Europe and developed Asian countries, such as Japan, than they do differences.
So, when American men go online seeking foreign women for marriage on mail-order bride websites, we have to wonder what they are looking for that they may not find in their home country. Clearly, there must be some things that are different between American and foreign women.
Differences Between American and Foreign Women
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Note: What follows are generalized explanations of the differences between these women – obviously, there are qualities in individual women that don’t conform to these.
Femininity
In general, American women have shed the overriding need to be staunchly feminine in dress, looks, and lifestyle. Many go for convenience and “efficiency” in appearance – simple hairstyles that are easy to maintain, clothing that does not require lots of care and is more business-oriented, and minimal makeup and accessories.
In terms of lifestyle, American women can be fiercely independent – so much so that they can turn a man off. It’s as if they need to show that they can thrive without help or support from a man.
Foreign women tend to be more feminine in looks and lifestyle. They are more often seen in dresses and skirts with carefully applied makeup and long hair that is beautifully styled, not scooped up into a ponytail or hanging out of a baseball cap. They take the time to make themselves beautiful in any situation, even if it is simply running errands.
They want a man’s attention, especially romantic gestures and small things such as helping her in and out of cars. These things make a man feel appreciated and needed.
Marriage and Divorce
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An American woman was once heard to say, “I’m not going to change the name on my driver’s license until I see if this marriage works out.” Given that the divorce rate in America is between 40-50%, that statement is not surprising. American women go into a marriage knowing that getting a divorce is easy if it doesn’t work out. They are thus less inclined to stick it out when major issues and challenges in the marriage arise. It’s just easier to move on.
And the marriage rate is declining too. Women are opting for “living together” arrangements rather than marriage. It’s just easier to get that U-Haul and move out if things don’t work out. After all, divorce can be messy and expensive.
Foreign women have a far different view of marriage. For them, marriage is “for keeps,” that is, for a lifetime. When the rough patches and challenges appear, their approach is to work through them and save the marriage above all else. In short, they do not see marriage as something that can ever be ended.
Family Values
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Here is another big lifestyle difference. Young American women who are ready for marriage have grown up in a society in which traditional family values have become secondary to their own wants, needs, and goals. Their families take a back seat as they pursue their goals.
Thus, children are left more with babysitters and nannies; they use meal delivery services or fast-food options to feed their families; they spend a lot of their at-home time in the evenings on their devices, either with work demands or catching up with friends on social media. And they are happy to put their kids on screens too, until it is bedtime.
Foreign mail-order brides see things very differently. Even though they may have their careers, family is just more important. They want to cook nutritious meals and even include their husbands and children in the preparation. Their family time in the evenings is a time to bond, to talk about their days, to play games, and to just enjoy each other.
American Men Seem to Long for More Traditional Relationships/Marriage
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American men often see American women as “competitors” rather than as life partners. And so, they go online and look for foreign women who better meet their needs. To find a foreign bride, they go to places like BridesUniverse – platforms that can provide them with reputable mail-order bride websites where they can begin to search without fear of being scammed or misled. They want to feel needed, respected, masculine, and valued as a marriage partner. Foreign brides give them all of these things.
